p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize
