Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
