I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
