Sry I called you an 8
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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