Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize