is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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