check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Cover your peen. We're going out.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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