just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
