I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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