I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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