lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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