Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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