Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
