just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Randomize