Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
