how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
