are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
