So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today