Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize