But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
