she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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