Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
