U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
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