I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Randomize
