He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
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my being single is dangerous.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
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Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
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