I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
