He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
