I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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