I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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