O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
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