But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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