I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
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