why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
wow bdsm is so cute
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