I feel like I'm in dance class right now
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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