Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Randomize
