yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize