Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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