Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Porn is love you can see.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
