Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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