I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
