the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
