I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
