I want to stick my p in your. b.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
