I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
