Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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