I could have mohawked her pubes.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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