After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
zippers are such a cool invention
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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