Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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