That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize