belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
